Monday, 20 September 2010

Amid the talks of FA mergers and other hectic improvement measures being taken, premier leagues of Turkeyilmaz had provided the much needed excitement in season 6.

Opinions may differ, but in the writer's opinion, TFA premier league has provided the most exciting fight for champion's place, whereas EFA premier league provided the most nerve wrecking finale for survival on the other end of the table.

Let's take a look at each specific FAs.



TFA - Top 4

Rank - Team - P - W - D - L - F - A - GD - Points
1 - Tottingpool Utd - 42 - 25 - 9 - 8 - 71 - 37 - +34 - 84 - <:emoticon#54> Champions <:emoticon#54>
2 - Bajen United - 42 - 25 - 8 - 9 - 86 - 39 - +47 - 83
3 - Newtownards - 42 - 24 - 10 - 8 - 68 - 38 - +30 - 82
4 - Atletico Annapurna I - 42 - 23 - 13 - 6 - 59 - 32 - +27 - 82

As you can see, the difference between first place and fourth place was mere 2 points!
We seldom see this kind of drama at the top of the table in modern football world.
Most exciting top of the table in my opinion and congratulations to Tottingpool Utd.
You truly deserve "survival of the fittest" trophy!

Now, let's take a look at the bottom of the table.

TFA - Bottom 5

Rank - Team - P - W - D - L - F - A - GD - Points
18 - Synyster Athletic - 42 - 11 - 12 - 19 - 41 - 51 - -10 - 45
19 - FC Hurja Tollikko - 42 - 12 - 8 - 22 - 51 - 79 - -28 - 44
20 - Celtic FC 1888 - 42 - 9 - 11 - 22 - 36 - 59 - -23 - 38
21 - Sale Spartans - 42 - 8 - 12 - 22 - 31 - 59 - -28 - 36
22 - The Unit - 42 - 5 - 14 - 23 - 23 - 57 - -34 - 29

Adios! These 5 teams will be demoted and compete in championship in season 7.
And congratulations to Malandathals for finishing in 17th place with 50 points and escaping relegation by 5 points!

Next we will discuss EFA premier league.



EFA - Top 6

Rank - Team - P - W - D - L - F - A - GD - Points
1 - Flakkster - 28 - 18 - 7 - 3 - 56 - 28 - +28 - 61 - <:emoticon#54> Champions <:emoticon#54>
2 - Bevsters - 28 - 14 - 3 - 11 - 45 - 31 - +14 - 45
3 - Rhee United - 28 - 13 - 6 - 9 - 45 - 31 - +14 - 45
4 - Rebel Football Club - 28 - 10 - 13 - 5 - 40 - 32 - +8 - 43
5 - Reggina 1914 FM 2009 - 28 - 12 - 6 - 10 - 42 - 42 - +1 - 42
6 - St Domingo 1878 - 28 - 10 - 12 - 6 - 37 - 36 - +1 - 42

Flakkster clearly ran away with the trophy in EFA, with a whopping 16 point lead over second place Bevsters.
More exciting was the race for the second place, with 5 teams involved in it.
Difference between second place and sixth place was mere 3 points.

Now let's go to the foot of the table.

EFA - Bottom 5

Rank - Team - P - W - D - L - F - A - GD - Points
11 - Central FC - 28 - 7 - 10 - 11 - 34 - 43 - -9 - 31
12 - Touching Apples - 28 - 8 - 7 - 13 - 32 - 41 - -9 - 31
13 - MadPsychos - 28 - 9 - 4 - 15 - 36 - 51 - -15 - 31
14 - Lobsterboy Utd. - 28 - 7 - 8 - 13 - 28 - 35 - -7 - 29
15 - Green Madness FC - 28 - 6 - 9 - 13 - 34 - 50 - -16 - 27

What a battle this was. 5 teams separated by 4 points and 3 of them were level on points.
Bottom 4 were to be relegated to championship and Central FC has just edged Touching Apples to survival by having a superior record in F (Goals For).

See this folks? This is why you need to play positive attacking football and score goals!
Remember how Italy was knocked out of Euro 2004 without losing? There is a lesson to be learned.

Congratulations to Central FC and good-bye to the bottom 4 teams.

Next will be GFA premier league.



GFA - Top 6

Rank - Team - P - W - D - L - F - A - GD - Points
1 - FC Warsaw - 32 - 20 - 6 - 6 - 54 - 25 - +29 - 66 <:emoticon#54> Champions <:emoticon#54>
2 - FC Real Minerz -- - 32 - 17 - 11 - 4 - 57 - 31 - +26 - 62
3 - Geronimo - 32 - 18 - 7 - 7 - 64 - 36 - +28 - 61
4 - Zenit United - 32 - 17 - 6 - 9 - 48 - 22 - +26 - 57
5 - Geordie Boot Boys 1988 - 32 - 16 - 9 - 7 - 52 - 43 - +9 - 57
6 - Bryn y Spurs - 32 - 14 - 12 - 6 - 51 - 32 - +19 - 54

Here at the top of GFA premier league, we saw 2 mini-league tables forming up. First, second, third places created a "championship table" and fourth, fifth, sixth places created "race to 4th table".
Congratulations to FC Warsaw, who became champions by somewhat comfortable 4 point margin.

Off to the bottom of the table then.

GFA - Bottom 6

Rank - Team - P - W - D - L - F - A - GD - Points
13 - Inter Yamam Fc - 32 - 7 - 9 - 16 - 30 - 48 - -18 - 30
14 - Tomimp United - 32 - 7 - 8 - 17 - 22 - 45 - -23 - 29
15 - Shark FC - 32 - 6 - 10 -16 - 25 - 46 - -21 - 28
16 - FC Misfits - 32 - 5 - 12 - 15 - 16 - 34 - -18 - 27
17 - Hopaspor SK - 32 - 7 - 2 - 23 - 22 - 66 - -44 - 23

Rather tight finish on the wrong end of the table. These 5 teams will be missing from GFA premier league next season. Congratulations to "Plymouth super greens" who finished 12th and grabbed the survival ticket with 34 points of 32 matches.

Next up will be VFA premier league.



VFA - Top 4

Rank - Team - P - W - D - L - F - A - GD - Points
1 - FC Leander - 30 - 19 - 6 - 5 - 52 - 23 - +29 - 63 <:emoticon#54> Champions <:emoticon#54>
2 - FC Hammarbacka - 30 - 15 - 7 - 8 - 52 - 36 - +16 - 52
3 - Grava City FC - 30 - 12 - 12 -6 - 52 - 41 - +11 - 48
4 - Vic la Guardiole FC - 30 - 13 - 9 - 8 - 41 - 31 - +10 - 48

No team came close enough to challenge FC Leander for the crown as FC Leander defended their VFA premier league title for second successive time. (Three times won in total).
Host of clubs in mid-table were gunning for second place, such was the quality of the teams in VFA.
But in the end it was FC Hammarbacka claiming the runner-up spot with Grava City FC and Vic la Guardiole FC only separated by Goal Differential for third and fourth.

Heading to the bottom of VFA premier league.

VFA - Bottom 5

Rank - Team - P - W - D - L - F - A - GD - Points
12 - Sango - 30 - 8 - 10 - 12 - 45 - 52 - -7 - 34
13 - SPORTING C.P - 30 - 8 - 8 - 14 - 35 - 40 - -5 - 32
14 - Munky Magic - 30 - 7 - 8 - 15 - 34 - 52 - -18 - 29
15 - Faroese Vikings - 30 - 6 - 9 - 15 - 36 - 62 - -26 - 27
16 - Best Benfica - 30 - 3 - 9 - 18 - 23 - 48 - -25 - 18

All these teams came up short as the surviving team, F.C. Meteorito finished eleventh with 40 points on a somewhat comfortable cushion of 6 points.
Upgrading their squad should be on their priority list if they are to get back into premier league and do well if there is next time!

Next up is OFA premier league.



OFA - Top 4

Rank - Team - P - W - D - L - F - A - GD - Points
1 - Perry Saint-Germain - 38 - 21 - 10 - 7 - 55 - 37 - +18 - 73 <:emoticon#54> Champions <:emoticon#54>
2 - Corporal Punishment F.C. - 38 - 20 - 11 - 7 - 59 - 34 - +25 - 71
3 - Birmingham Hunter's - 38 - 19 - 9 - 10 - 49 - 27 - +22 - 66
4 - Lok Feldberg - 38 - 18 - 9 - 11 - 43 - 34 - +9 - 63

OFA premier league was the only premier league mimicking the real EPL with 20 teams.
Here it looked like Perry Saint-Germain edged out a 3 horse race against Corporal Punishment F.C and Birmingham Hunter's with Lok Feldberg applying the outside pressure on top 3.
Lok Fedberg wasn't a distant 4th themselves, only 10 points off of the pace of first place Perry Saint-Germain.

Is this how 2010 - 2011 EPL is going to look come May 2011? We shall see.

Congratulations to Perry Saint-Germain for their title.

Onto the bottom of the table.

OFA - Bottom 5

Rank - Team - P - W - D - L - F - A - GD - Points
16 - FC Pie Eaters - 38 - 10 - 11 - 17 - 33 - 35 - -2 - 41
17 - Clairefontaine - 38 - 10 - 11 - 17 - 27 - 45 - -18 - 41
18 - Gimp Athletic - 38 - 8 - 11 - 19 - 33 - 54 - -21 - 35
19 - Dollis Hill - 38 - 8 - 8 - 22 - 38 - 64 - -26 - 32
20 - Danko United - 38 - 5 - 5 - 28 - 30 - 90 - -60 - 20

These 5 teams are relegated from OFA this season and FC Pie Eaters must be cursing out lady luck.
If FC Pie Eaters had managed to get 1 more draw they would've been level on points with "Liverpool young 'uns" who finished 15th place with 42 points.

And chances are, FC Pie Eaters would've survived because of their far superior goal difference. (Liverpool young'uns had -8)
And it looks like the manager of Danko United has found life in football management difficult and decided not to continue their journey as a football club. Farewell, Danko United will always be remembered as a premier league club even with that disgusting record.

I think only Portsmouth, Sunderland and Derby has managed to do worse with 19, 15, 11 points respectively. (I may be wrong)

Recap of CFA and DFA will be in next part...
I ran out of characters to write!!
Sorry about that folks..

Saturday, 21 August 2010

" STUFFED " season 6 week 1

Its saturday so heres your weekly " STUFFED " supplement.

With only 4 days gone into season 6 things are already hotting up, so lets have a look over how the gameworld is getting along.

Currently flying high at the top of each FA are Utopians '73 (DFA), FC Kukushastiki (CFA), Grava City FC (VFA), Bevsters (EFA), Spartoorian FC (TFA), Lok Feldberg (OFA) and FC Real Minerz-- (GFA).


With in the prem below is a round up of the top scorers:

DFA prem top scorer is Goran Pejovic of Milan AC with 9 goals in 10 games.
CFA prem top scorers are Slawomir Piatek of Bunio United and Lucas Guerrero of FC Kukushastiki with 7 goals in 17 games and 7 goals in 15 games respectivaly.
VFA prem top scorer is Jean-Paul N'Siabamfumu of Grava City FC with 9 goals in 12 games.
EFA prem top scorer is João of Bevsters with 9 goals in 12 games.
TFA prem top scorer is Rune Pettersen of Bajen United with 9 goals in 11 games.
OFA prem top scorer is Omar Cherkaoui of Chaos utd with 6 goals in 8 games.
GFA prem top scorer is Dragos Alexandru of Geordie Boot Boys 1988 with 5 goals in 8 games.

We have had a few new members to the gameworld too :0D so please greet them with a warm welcome they are :
Craig Poole of 568mL FC
Mike Cowan of FC Puck You Sir
Nick Miler of Fc Barcalona
Lee Baker. of Pigs Might Fly FC
Gabriele Valentini of FC AMOR
Darren Swadling of Braemar Rovers
Alex Wardle of St Elmos Fire
Joe Dunne of Dunney United F.C

A quick look over the transfers since season starts see some big moves, the top 5 buy value are:

Mario Borrelli from Tickled Pink to Goals R Us FC for 11 million
Per Abrahamsson from FC Makaveli to FC Real Minerz-- for 9.25 million
Mohamed Charlot from Goals R Us FC to Newtownards for 5.5 million + Nicolas Derrien
Mattia Martini from Celtic FC 1888 to Goals R Us FC for 5 million + Patrick
Walter Gonçalves from Oakland Park Angels to FC Leander for 5.5 million + Nhlanhla Ningiza



Dont forget to join the " STUFFED" comps they will start on Monday 23rd Aug.

STUFFED Senior cup
STUFFED U21 Cup
STUFFED U19 Cup
STUFFED U17 Cup
Also keep an eye out for the daily quick plays in the Xtra Football Association.



Dont forget tonight sees the second Human Vs bot comp :0D win yourself some reward points , to join in get yourself into Human V Bot Comp [Holding Area], or contact Paul "Scally" O'Brien for more details.


Next week the RFA kicks off for all the new members to the gameworld, and we will have a review of how the UFFA comps are getting along.


If you wouldlike to help out the community, either with quizzes or the first gameworld paper "STUFFED" or have any suggestions for " STUFFED " or community comps please contact Buddy Christ or a member of the mod team.


Thanks for reading the Community team.

Friday, 6 August 2010

"STUFFED" The back Page - Week 1

“STUFFED TURKYILMAZ"


Back Pages with Anchor Man DASEIN

News headlines hot off the press

Following a series of small yet annoying adverts, this week sees the launch of the first Turkilmaz gameworld paper. Yes, “STUFFED” has arrived, well “STUFFED TURKILMAZ” to use its proper name. Each week on Saturday “STUFFED” will have all the news and a few articles here and there and you have your chance to voice your opinion, and win reward point prizes. So please send in your stuff to our team and who knows you could afford that mascot! Send in jokes to LMAO with Phil Brennan send in funny match clips and blooper goals to Juve Been Framed with Jonatan Maradona send your best moves in the market to Thomas Morgan’s Market Place Muscle, write to Agnes our GW agony aunt to help you with any problems, and if you have any feedback about “STUFFED” from next week you can contact DASEIN. Ash Evans’ Treasure Hunt will offer a chance to follow the clues and link the ‘treasure’, if you are 1 of the 1st 10 people to reply with the correct treasure you can win 2000 reward points. Otherwise, anything you send in and we use in STUFFED will be rewarded a whopping 1000 reward points.

Here at STUFFED we are proud to announce the emergence of the Turkyilmaz on line massive. Be a part of it on twitter- twitter.com/turkgw

Or via facebook facebookhttp://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=108939225797833&ref=ts

We also have a specific STUFFED blog page, so for more STUFFED stuff please visit http://stuffed-tmaz.blogspot.com/ (HERE)

The STUFFED team will be there. Make sure you are too.

To celebrate the launch of STUFFED and our internet community, we have sorted a few comps with reward point prizes, and it’s free to enter!

The are all in the XFA so keep an eye out for them guys.

In other news:

On Wednesday Azeez Ade of Kings Knights made a bold statement to gather support for a mass restart ”On that note I call on any manager (with 15+ stars) brave enough to join me at the end of say season 8 to Restart. Right, Who is with me??”. Watch this space. We’ll be sure to keep you posted as season 8 approaches. Who knows we may even run a straw poll to see who is with Azeez.

The volcano like debate over advertising in the market place was bubbling throughout the week, until it well and truly erupted on Wednesday. With a particularly ill tempered spat between two managers we wont name (so don’t ask) regarding the advertised sale price and subsequent bids for the player. “STUFFED” verdict:- No one ever seems to get what they want in situations like that, so we don’t think it is worth the hassle.

"STUFFES" Movers & Shakers Week 1

What’s happening in the leagues, and the cups? Not sure? Well why not cast a glance over Movers & Shakers?




EFA top 5 in prem at point of going to press.

FC Makaveli
St Domingo 1878
sango
Bevsters
Rhee United

Top scorer - Lee Gray 11 goals in 9 games

Thru to FA cup final are Rhee United who will meet Miles Davis XI or Celtic 67's



CFA top 5 in prem at point of going to press

Worthies Sports
gladiators fc
Spam Your Goal
FC Kukushastiki
Sporting Club Helsinki

Top scorer - David Hernández 13 goals in 23 games

FA Cup was won by Red Star Pezza after they beat Sporting Club Helsinki 4 V 3 on pens


VFA top 5 in prem at point of going to press

FC Leander
Grunt Boys United
geddes utd
Grava City FC
Vic la Gardiole FC

Top scorer is Diego Figueroa and Nikita Tarakanov both with 16 goals in 21 games

FA cup final is between Saffrons and Grunt Boys United


GFA top 5 in prem at point of going to press

Torpoint Athletic
FcuLater
FC Misfits
Zenit united
Rainbow Soldiers

Top scorer Ervin Deda with 24 goals in 33 games

The semis finals are between Hotshots CantonaVs AFC Malkinand and Urban Habits FCVs Rainbow Soldiers


OFA top 5 in prem at point of going to press

Lok Feldberg
Noobs United
Perry Saint-Germain
Corporal Punishment F.C
Loitering Lions

Alex Hofman 11 goals in 25 games

FA cup final is between Loitering Lions Vs Corporal Punishment F.C


DFA top 5 in prem at point of going to press

Newtownards
Milan AC
The Unshushables
Los Elephants
Tottingpool Utd

Top scorer is Jaroslav Vavra and Tom Hall with 26 goals in 49 and 42 game respectivly.

Fa cup is between I n s o m n i a Vs Newtownards:team


TFA top five in prem at point of going to press

Atletico Annapurna l
Bajen United
FC Warsaw
FC Vampire
Krallville Kosmonauts

Top scorer is Rune Pettersen with 15 goals in 33 games

In the FA cup final will be HITMEN UTD who will play either Smokin Gun FCor Bajen United



All Stats and roundups will be more comprehensive in the mid week episode of STUFFED, that will be based around your own FA.

"STUFFED" Inside Foreword - Week 1

This week’s article: Player Cloning




Considering we are in a fantasy players gameworld, and there are supposed to be no real players in the game. Over the months I have noticed that there are quite a few fantasy players that are very similar to players in the real world. For instance an old player of mine maldonano is very similar to Christiano Ronaldo (besides his nationality). Jon Olsson says: (18:50:33) Arsenal’s Robin Van Persi is like Soeris Langenberg, which certainly rings true for the Dutch household name forward. Jon also thinks that his German midfield maestro Tino Bertram is a direct copy the former Chelsea man Michael Ballack. And can you see Daniel Hoskins’s point that his striker Anton Rybalko is a close match to the Spurs front man Roman Pavlyuchenko?

So what are these similarities born out of? Is it that we, as football fans, automatically see a fantasy player and try to personalize him? Make him the player that we recognize? Make him the player that we see from the terraces and from our living room armchairs? It could be that our fantasy players are, on occasion, based on real life players. Or that just be numerical coincidence with the amazing amount of players in the gw some will be very similar to real players. What do you think? Do you have any players that you think are similar to real players? Please send them in to us and if we use them you will get 1000 reward points and you may help start a regular bit in STUFFED.

"STUFFED" Market Place Muscle Week 1

A look at the weeks major moves in the market.




The transfer market is never on fire the week before season start, but there have been some major moves and shakes this week.



The most discussed deal had to be the one done at Newtownars. Kevin Wintle signing Austrian Wonderkid Thomas Hauser, for £7,000,001. Polish manager Andrzej Golubowski's will be laughing his way to the bank with that wedge of cash while Kevin has added one of the best full backs in the GW to one of the top squads in the GW.



However, the value of this was dwarfed by Mohamed Charlot's £13m move to Goals R Us FC. Heitor Silva Dos Anjos, opting to pay the joint second highest fee EVER in Tmaz history. The 19 year old French Striker will be looking to repay his manager in goals for years to come.



On a usual week Márcio da Silva's move to join the young gun slingers at FC Kuti would have been the big news. The central defender moved in a player + cash deal from Will Elliot's team. Both managers will surely think this deal is good for both.



Most inflated deal of the week is Mustapha Sarr at 16 he has already made 2 seven figure moves, after his 2.2m move last season he now joins SOS AllStars He may be the hottest property in youth football. The lad definitely has the world at his feet. Rob Spencer has had a week of it signing 5 separate teenagers for over £1,000,000 each. He'll be hoping the cliché you'll never win anything with kids isn't true.



Deal of the week is Alejandro Funes. His £2 (YES 2 POUND) move to F.C. Bialaska. It is a great demonstration of both the risk and reward of transfer auctions. Just think you could have 6.5million Funes's for the price of Mohamed Charlot. That’s double the population of Wales.

Next week is sure to be an exciting one as the season ends and squads build for season 6.... You’ll find all of the news here in be it a Diamond or Donut, my Market Place Muscle will be here to tell all.

"STUFFED" Reception Report - Week 1

An (occasional) article welcoming and focusing on turkyilmaz’ newest members.




In our first edition of STUFFED TURKYILMAZ we interview new man in Turkyilmaz Durban Devils manager Martin Nulty



Hi there Martin & welcome to Turkyilmaz



STUFFED: Whats your initial impressions of the GW?

Martin Nulty: I like the gw, lots of nice people to talk to and generally alot of fun with good community spirit



STUFFED: Have you played FML before?

Martin Nulty: Not before this week



STUFFED: How are you enjoying it so far?

Martin Nulty: I think its good fun I’m pretty addicted already, I like the differences between fm too like the way u learn skills and that u can build ur own stadium



STUFFED: Your team is currently near the top of the Reception Football Association, what are your ambitions in relation to your team and how competitive do you expect them to be?

Martin Nulty: My ambitions would be to move up the rankings as quickly as possible and hopefully make it to the premier league someday lol, my team is pretty competitive at the moment but as they are mostly older than 30 ill need to bring in some younger players so i can compete in the comin yrs

STUFFED: Have you found it difficult to compete with established managers & teams or do you feel you can challenge with the setup you intend to/currently operate?

Martin Nulty I have found it ok i guess i have beat a few teams much higher ranked than myself and i think the set up is good



STUFFED: As a newbie to the GW what are your expectations in relation to your fellow teams & managers?

Martin Nulty: Well I expect the same treatment in the transfer market but I do agree there could be more money for lower teams to increase chances of competing with top ranked teams



STUFFED: What do you expect from your new FA and have you decided on which FA you will join?

Martin Nulty Not sure which FA to join yet to be honest i dont know to much about them, but i expect them to be able to challange and to have a chance to move up the leagues i would defo like to play face to face more than ai

STUFFED: Have you any concerns in relation to entering an established GW after it has been running now for 5 seasons?

Martin Nulty A little but it means a better challange and is more realistic so i guess id prefer it that way anyway and higher ranked and richer teams will sometimes let players go very cheap if they dont need them so i can get a bargain



Ok Martin thanks very much for being our guinea pig for this first edition and taking the time to talk to us, we would like to wish you all the best in your future endeavours within Turkyilmaz.

"STUFFED" Dear Agnes Week 1

However personal your problem might be, our resident agony aunt- Agnes is here to help.






Dear Angus.

I saw a cat get run over on the way to work today. What can I do to make myself less sad?

Pauly Wauly



Dear Paul,

Whilst I understand your upset at seeing one of God's creatures being harmed you must see that there is a purpose to everything that happens. Rejoice in the fact the cat maybe wanted to get run over, as it may have been having a terrible life but now is eternally happy in the afterlife. Either that or maybe it was playing 'dodge the car' with its Cat friends and was terrible at it, and therefore deserves to die for being an epic failure.

I hope this reply offers you some comfort.

Thanks, Agnes





Dear Agnes,

I have a big problem, I cant keep my team in form in my league, everytime we are doing good and start winning matches, i get **** injuries and it kills my team. Its like every other match theres an injury or two that leaves my players out for like 5 matches.. it only really ****es me off because is very unrealistic..

What can I do? Is there anything I can do? other then having my players wear like knee,elbows pads, ankle and wrist bracelets, and a helmet....

thanks!,

Jonatan Maradona



Dear Jonatan,

Unrealistic?

You are managing a football team without even applying for the position or being interviewed. You are completely unqualified and inexperienced and your performance has been mediocre at best. Yet you will never get sacked no matter how badly you do. This seems perfectly fine to you, yet a few injuries do not?

To help you cope with the pressures though I suggest getting a wife / girlfriend, they always know best and are very supportive of their FML addicted partners.

Thanks

Agnes





Dear Agnes

Please help

My team is top of the table and i should be happy but i'm very scared of heights and feel i cant cope and its spoiling my game as each time i look at the table i feel sick

Is the anything you can do to help me with this



Dear Reader who deemed it not important enough to sign their name,

Whenever in a situation like this I turn to the great Graeme Souness, his autobiography is available (http://www.amazon.co.uk/Souness-Management-Years-Graeme/dp/0233997385) and is sure to contain the losing formula for turning top the table leaders to mid table minnows!

Thanks

Agnes (look it is not hard to sign your name!) [ed- Agnes’ views are not necessarily supported by STUFFED in this instance]





Dear Agnes,

FML is far too addictive,

My gf is goin to leave me soon coz FML is my Mistress ...

what shud i do?> lol

Joe Igoe



Dear Joe,

I have great concerns about your mental state, judging by your final statement my professional opinion would be that you do not have a girlfriend, and it is merely a desperate attempt to get attention. If you would like to book a private appointment to talk through your problems please email me at veryoverpriced@counsellingexpert.biz.uk

Thanks

Agnes

"STUFFED" Mystic Messi - Week 1

Your weekly fml horoscope from our very own Mystic Messi.






Aries~ With the Moon heading over Uranus, this signifies that a great change in tactics will effect you this week. I can see a wandering star and an ambition achieved.



Taurus~ You bulls this week will be enjoying a new relationship, is it a new player, a new friend, or a new lover? A green man appears, beware!



Gemini~ This week Gemini is in the 4th quarter and you will be twinned to a new club. I see a brotherhood developing and player being disgruntled.



Cancer~ It will be a very busy week but don’t let it slip past without enjoying it, you have a flow about you that no one can stop and there is a imposing defender on the cards.



Leo~ Brave lions will be put to the test this week, a fierce competitor is in your midst, if you stick to your guns I see you being celebrated, if you don’t I see you being egged in the stocks.



Virgo~ Don’t worry, Mystic Messi knows that sometimes virgos need a hand around their shoulder, but now is not the time to dwell on negatives. This could be your moment, Carpe Diem.



Libra~ Taking a new approach is vital this week. So take heed Mystic Messi is seeing danger with the path you have chosen. A piece of fruit will be strangely important.



Scorpio~ As per usual there will be a sting in the tail this week, brace yourself and you’ll come good. A frantic moment in the lobby will get you laughing.



Sagittarius~ Venus is in your quarter, this gives hope of a new attacking force that you may have thought was a failure. You enjoy the company of a Taurus as well.



Capricorn~ Enjoy your current luck because Mystic Messi can see that is about to change and there is nothing you can do about it. There are black and evil days ahead. Oh and you have a lovely chat with a lady.



Aquarius~ A traveler will make his wishes known this week, and with Mars moving to Uranus

It could be a tricky week to deal with.



Pisces~ Fish try to swim by but can sometimes let things upset them too much. This week a transaction comes unstuck which will make you hide away in your castle and cry.

"STUFFED" Juve been framed! - Week1

Almost everyone knows You've Been Framed! Well this is Juve Been Framed! A collection of funny match clips and blooper goals. If you have a lol clip why not send it in? You could win 1000 reward points. (CHECK THE CLIP’S OUT IN TMAZ)






This week’s top clips are:



5th place...

Moulin Own Goal

LOL... nothing much to say about this goal.. but when coach tells you to keep your eye on the ball, he doesn`t mean literally...



4th place...

Rocco Goal

This video was donated by Dave Nicholls; he was very disappointed with his keeper since this was his grand debut. After the match there was an interview where his keeper was quoted saying-

" Yes I admit some of it was my fault, i say 15 percent. it looked like an easy ball for me, but when it got closer and closer, it started moving side to side and then i looked right into the sun and i lost the ball... I say 75 percent of it it’s that damn Jabulani ball..."



3rd place...

Tounkara Own Goal

TOUNKARA Yells "I got it!!.. oh f---.." .... "my bad" hahaha

Well done Tounkara!



2nd place...

Muñoz Goal

I have no Idea what the keeper Hernandez was thinking here.. but i guess he felt he wasnt getting enough assist with his team so he decided to get some for the other team... gotta love the clip! Good Job Hernandez!



1st place Blooper of the week..

Moisés Own Goal Bassole take a great shot from the outside and the keeper yells "Moises ball!! sike!, ouch, who just hit me in my back... oh"



Congratulations Moises! Your clip is the winner of the week!

"STUFFED" LMAO - Week1

LMAO with Phil Brennan


Send in your clean jokes. Everyone that sends in a featured joke will receive 1000 reward points!



Jean Ahmed

Someone really needs to start a petition to ban football from vuvuzela concerts.



James Howard

What have Blackburn FC and a three pin plug got in common? A: They're both absolutely useless in Europe



Mustapha Zaza

Emile plans to open a pub when he retires - because he's great at putting shots over the bar



Joe Igoe

What do you call an Arsenal fan in a suit?.... the accused



Joe Igoe

The seven dwarfs are down in the mines when there is a cave-in.Snow White runs to the entrance and yells down to them.In the distance a voice shouts out "Arsenal" are good enough to win the European Cup."Snow White says "Well at least Dopey's alive!"



James Howard

There was once a fanatical Spurs supporter who thought of nothing but football all day long. He talked about football, read about football, watched nothing but football on television and attended matches as often as he possibly could. At last his poor wife could. stand it no longer. One night she said, 'I honestly believe you love Spurs more than you love me!''Blimey,' said the fan, 'I love Hartlepool United more than I love you!'



James Howard

met this really kinky girl last night. "Humiliate me", she said, So I bought her a Tottenham shirt!



Joe Igoe

Rob Green has injured himself. Apparently, he put his head in his hands and immediately kneed himself in the face



Joe Igoe

David Blaine is reportedly furious after England crashed out of the World Cup – his record of doing absolutely nothing in a box for 42 days was broken by Wayne Rooney.



Fred Williams

I met a fairy the other day who granted me one wish..."i want to live forever" i said, "sorry" said the fairy, "i'm not allowed to give out wishes like that".."fine" i said, "i want to die when Glasgow Rangers wint he european cup"..."you crafty b*****d" said the fairy

Tuesday, 3 August 2010

Announcing The T-Maz Fantasy premier league

With less than 2 weeks until the football season starts. We have a Fantasy football league set up, details are below about how to join. I have sorted in game prizs for the winners so join up now. Hopefully there will also be weekly updates in the Tmaz paper and maybe just maybe monthly prizes for the team who scores the most from month to month..


So if you are up for joining details are below..


Here is the site:
http://fantasy.premierleague.com/

And here is the code for the Private League:
314750-86416

Test 2

Ummmm well ummm did it work ?